


Careful Where You Stand in Paradise

by lifeinanothersarms



Category: Coldplay (Band)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-17
Updated: 2014-06-05
Packaged: 2018-01-16 01:05:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 16,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1325983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lifeinanothersarms/pseuds/lifeinanothersarms
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alessandra is a best-selling author, but the madness is slowly bring her down. To get her mind out of it, she attends Coldplay's concert with a few friends. Yet, she gets a lot more than she expects....</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Beginning

Being in L.A. is nice and relaxing- it is warm and sunny and most of all, if you’re me, you’re NEVER left alone. People find a way to find you. Most authors go unrecognized, but I guess I am the opposite, as the public calls me “a once in a lifetime” or “the Shakespeare of our age”. I’m only twenty, and I have a five book series called “The Prodigy Rings”. The first was released when I was 18 when all of them were already written, so I don’t have to worry about being on a time frame. They have become an instant hit, and now, they are talking about making it into a movie. My literary agent also tells me to start writing more books so that’s what I’m supposed to be doing. But that’s hard considering every five minutes someone asks for an autograph or picture. Thank God tonight will be better. I will be blending in with a crowd of people along with my good friend Harry Styles and his bandmate, Niall Horan. Tonight, we’ll see our inspiration, Coldplay.  
Coldplay is a major influence on my life, especially my writing. I was 14 when I heard a song of theirs, and I instantly fell for it. I bought all their albums and realized they had songs for everything going on in my life. I didn’t feel alone. Now seeing them live is going to complete my fandom.  
“Miss, you need to run, now,” the security guard reminds me. I immediately sprint out of the hotel and dart for the jeep.  
“Al, who’s playing Lily in your movie?”  
“Miss-“  
“Oh my God, look!” were a few of the things I hear as the cameras flash and people scream.  
When I get in the backseat of the Jeep and shut the door, I find myself next to Harry. He smiles as usual and asks, “Rough crowd?”  
“No, just loud,” I answer. Then, I head two laughs. I look over Harry and see Niall. He instantly holds out a hand, and I take it. We are all the same age, so no problems here. We are off to the concert.  
As we pull up, I start to see how big the concert actually is. Coldplay draws huge ceowds everywhere they go. That’s when Harry, Niall, and I decide to disguise ourselves so people won’t recognize us.  
Niall dyes his hair with temporary black and slicks it back while he throws on biker clothes. Harry’s hair is straightened, and he also put fake piercings in along with skater clothes. I put my hair into two loose pigtails with my big black glasses on. With that, I put Harry’s sweatshirt on. My disguise is the most pathetic!  
“Who’s ready to see the show?” Harry asks, disguising his British accent with an American one.  
“I am for sure,” Niall answers in a somewhat southern accent.  
I laugh at his fail and say, “Definitely!” in my best British accent. Harry taught me well.  
Harry and I met at a Mylo Xyloto art auction. Of course we knew who each other were (I like One Direction, and he and Liam obsessed over my books), and instantly hit it off. We got into an auction war, and he won because I wasn’t going over $10,000 for a tiny piece of work. Harry and I then went out for coffee and talked 3 hours straight about Coldplay. He mentioned Niall has connections with Chris, so we might meet them.  
We waited for ages to get in, but we have front row seats. People take double takes of us, but don’t say anything. When we get to our seats, there are still 40 minutes until the opening act. So we talk about different things, but as Niall is finishing up about Nandos, a familiar face comes out, and heads for me: Phil Harvey.  
“Hey, guys, I’m going to ask you to come with me,” he double takes Niall and Harry and finishes, “Your friends can come too.” Phil then helps us on stage and to the back.  
I only have been backstage once for Harry, but this is different. Why was I asked back here at this concert?  
Then I see Chris.  
The Chris Martin.  
He holds out his arms and shouts across the way, “There she is!” looking directly at me. I turn and look behind me, but no one is there.  
“Come here, you!” he shouts to me. I start walking towards him, head in the clouds, and he runs towards me. As we approach, he hugs me, filled with energy and joy with a cheeky smile on his face.  
“Love, I’m so happy to have finally met you!” he says to me.  
“D- Do you have the right person?” I ask, still in shock.  
“Yes! You’re Alessandra fucking Marino!” he confirms ecstatically.  
“How do you know-“  
“I read your books, bloody genius! Didn’t your manager tell you-“  
“No, I had no idea!” I explain.  
“Sorry then, this must have been quite weird for you!” he apologizes, “So are these your… friends?”  
“Chris!” Niall screeches.  
“Yes, you know Niall I believe-“  
“Niall, you fucking madman!” Chris exclaims, pulling Niall in for a noogy.  
Then I finish, “And this is Harry, Harry Styles.”  
“Harry, I’ve been waiting to meet you too! I hear I’m like your inspiration too!” Chris squeals, grabbing Harry for a hug, then shouting, “Boys! We got company!” Oh shit. I quickly take out the pigtails and the glasses.  
When the first one sees me, his green eyes widened and smile expanded. His hat flies off as he runs full speed towards me, “Sweetheart, Chris wasn’t lying! I love you and your books!”  
“Jonny, you are a guitar god; I am extremely jealous!” I pipe out before he picks me up and spins in a circle. He faintly kisses me on the cheek and runs over to mess with Chris.  
A tap on my shoulder comes next. Turning around, I grow excited and hug him as I murmur, “Will!”  
“’Bout time we meet you! Your books are incredible!” he says back releasing me.  
“Your drumming is amazing. You’re even a bigger sweetie in person!” I squeal. Then, next to Will, Guy Berryman appears. My heart skips a beat.  
Will then runs off to answer Jonny, and Guy opens up his arms. I quickly proceed in them.  
“Guy, don’t even get me started on you,” I warn, still hugging him.  
“Your books are really good; I’m on the third one,” he says, letting go of me.  
Chris then walks over and says, “Well, Rih Rih can’t make it. What will we do for Princess of China?”  
I suggest, “Harry or Niall?”  
“No!” they simultaneously say, Niall finishing with, “I’m not singing a girl part!”  
“Recalling Al’s blog, she was in a band,” Jonny starts.  
“No!” I stop.  
“Oh yeah! She sang too. She still does, but only occasionally due to her books!” Will adds. I shake my head no, even after all the death stares.  
“Al, please,” Chris begs.  
“You know what, I’ll split the part with you; how about that?” Harry deals out. I then jab Niall in the side, and he agrees, “Oh, yeah.”  
“Fine,” I say, and everyone cheers. As we rehearse it, I already feel sick.  
When we return to our seats, Niall bitches the dye and puts on a wig. Harry got his curly hair back over time and now wears Jonny’s extra hat.  
Then, there is me, in a fucking kimono. Niall and Harry laughed at me along with Chris, Will, and Jonny while Guy walked in a stated, “What? I think she looks gorgeous!” Before the boys could crack up again, the opening act ended. Therefore, Coldplay was about to begin.  
Being in front row is awesome, besides hearing all the people behind you screaming bloody murder. I don’t blame them though; I am too! Then, the stadium turns yellow, and the noise escalates about ten times more.  
“Your skinnnn….” Chris begins. Then, the instruments come in. Heaven is released along with the large yellow balloons. Also, having the amazing voices of Harry and Niall by your side make it incredible. A vibe of love and emotions ring through the stadium. This concert is amazing.  
Most of the Mylo Xyloto songs are played along with ‘God Put a Smile Upon Your Face’, ‘The Scientist’, ‘Viva La Vida’, ‘Clocks’, ‘Fix You’, ‘The Speed of Sound’, and ‘Lost!’. Then, it is our turn. People quickly surround us as our makeup and microphones are put on within less than a minute.  
“Chris then says, “You guys are incredible and deserve a very big last-minute surprise! Guy described her as gorgeous! Here we go!”  
The music begins loud and clear. Niall covers the “ooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhh” parts with Will. I mix with Chris, and Harry would sing the chorus with us.  
“Once upon a time, somebody ran. Somebody ran away saying fast as I can! Got to go! I got to go! Once upon a time, we fell apart. You’re holding in your hands the two halves of my heart!”  
I feel like I’m going to be sick, but when my part comes; I walk down the stage and sing like I promised. Chris and I meet and keep eye contact.  
During the middle instrumental, Chris shouts, “Everybody! Niall Horan! Harry Styles! Alessandra Marino! One! Two! Three! Four!”  
I walk around the stage during this, especially Guy. We actually make eye contact and smile at each other. Then, I get back to Chris. Romantically singing with him is hard, but ended alright, especially when Harry comes in, getting in between us. But the song still ends with Chris and me extremely close to each other, holding each other’s faces.  
“That was fucking amazing!” Chris states, “Give it up for these three goofballs!”  
Harry, Niall, and I bow, but before I can leave, Chris grabs me and asks, “So, Guy, do you still think she’s gorgeous?!”  
“She isn’t- she’s incredibly gorgeous!” Guy exclaims as the crowd claps, whistles, and screams. I hug Chris, Will, and Jonny, and for the audience, hug Guy last. They whistle a bunch, I wave, and left. The final song is ‘Every Teardrop is a Waterfall’.  
As the confetti butterflies fly around, Niall, Harry, and I dance around, trying to catch them. I then get on Harry’s shoulders and cheer for the band, screaming random things.  
When I scream, “Guy, I love you!” he looks up and laughs.  
The song ends, and Chris shouts, “Thank you L.A., you were fantastic!” The boys line up and bow; quickly running back stage right after.  
Before we can head out, Phil comes back and escorts us backstage once more. As I see Chris, I exclaim, “Best show ever!”  
“You rocked, dude!” Harry follows.  
“Great show, mate!” Niall says as I hug Chris. Sure, he is all sweaty, but it is Chris Martin for crying out loud!  
“Thank you! You’re all invited back to our hotel for a little celebration, if you’d like!” Chris offers.  
I begin, “Chris, I’d love to but-“  
“We’re in! Let us stop for food, and we’ll be right over!” Niall finishes.  
As Harry and I turn to him with ‘what-the-fuck-looks, Chris mentions, “Tacos it is! See you soon!” before running off.  
“Where’s the hotel?” I ask Harry.  
He replies, “Chris just texted me the address, but we need those tacos!”  
“Yes, food! I’m starved!” Niall exclaims, “Oh, but, Al, why were you going to say no?”  
“I have a huge book signing tomorrow morning, and I owe my literary agent another chapter too!” I explain.  
“Oh, well, live a little!” Niall argues, play tugging me. Harry slowly begins to walk off.  
“Fine,” I agree, rolling my eyes with a smile.  
He pecks me on the cheek and runs for the Jeep. Harry and I race right behind him.


	2. The After-Party

With tacos in Harry's hands, we approach Coldplay's suite. Before I can knock, Jonny opens the with a cheerful "ahhh!" and hugs all of us. The suite is huge- more like an over-sized apartment!

"My tacos!" Chris exclaims, taking them from Harry,

"Chris, you're going to share!" Harry protests, following him to the couch. Niall them follows Harry, longing for food. Will is taking a shower while Jonny turns on the music. Being hungry myself, I go out to find the kitchen.

Walking in, I find Guy making himself a giant bowl of cheddar broccoli soup. It smells amazing.

"Why, hello there!" Guy says, looking shocked to see me.

"Hi," I manage out, glancing at the soup.

"You don't dig tacos either?" he asks, rather amused.

"Nope," we both laugh.

"Do you want half?" he asks, pointing at the soup.

"Yes, sir!" I answer, taking a seat at the table.

"That show tonight was the bomb! I think I'll write about it in my blog later," I mention as Guy brings the soup to the table, along with two spoons.

As he takes two glasses out of the cabinet and a bottle of red wine out of the fridge, he questions, "Oh, really?"

"Yes! I absolutely love you guys!" I exclaim, about to take in my first spoonful of soup.

"How long, since tonight?" he asks, pouring the wine.

"No, actually since I was fourteen, that's when I got serious. Viva La Vida has been my favorite song since... thanks for the faith," I correct, taking the wine. But before I can grab it, Guy takes my hand and says, "Wait, you're only twenty."

"So?'

"So, you're underage!" With that statement, we stare each other down for a good minute, until we both give in and crack up. Maybe Guy isn't that harsh; maybe he's really sweet, but takes time to open up. He gives me my glass back.

After a few spoons of soup, Guy asks, "So Viva La Vida?"

"Yes," I reply.

"Why that one?"

It takes me a while to think, but then I come up with, "Well, I don't really know; it just reaches out to me."

Everything breaks out after that. Our conversation goes from Coldplay to my books to our personal life, and stops at the Beatles. That's when the soup is gone, and there's no more wine to drink.

"So you love me?" Guy asks as I throw our dishes in the sink.

"You actually heard me?" I question back.

He walks over to me and answers, "Yeah, why do you think I looked up and gave you a smile?"

"You little shit," I smile.

"So if you love me, why didn't you let me know?" he asks, a smirk still on his face.

"I barely knew you!"

"Well now you do!"

"Love is a HUGE word though!"

"Only four letters, love," he softly speaks before his lips meet mine, but we pull away once we realize what we are doing. His eyes are so dark- warm and enticing, melting my heart. I pull him back to me. His lips are soft and gentle, like a light breeze against my face. His hands hold my hips and slowly move up and down my back like I'm his bass. I push my fingers through his hair and eventually find the back of his neck, while my other hand holds his lower back, holding his shirt, begging him to let me go.

"Alex, Guy, come here!" Jonny shouts from the next room. I pull away, biting my lower lip.

He looks down at me, still holding me. "We should go," I whisper, letting go. I walk into the next room to find everyone surrounding the piano. Oh, no.

"Alex, I've got a deal for you," Chris begins, "If you play and sing a song on here, I'll play Charlie Brown right after. Deal?" Charlie Brown is one of my favorites; I can't resist, "Deal." They all cheer as I take a seat at the colorful MX piano. Guy has finally joined us too. I can't fail now.

I used to play the piano, along with guitar, for my band in high school. Thinking, I pick a favorite of the band's and most audiences, 'I Am the Walrus' by The Beatles. As I start the intro, I notice another instrument mixing with my own: a bass. Guy stands next to my, plucking away like Paul McCartney. I begin the lyrics, feeling a bit silly but more of myself: I guess I'm weird. Soon, Jonny adds his guitar, and Will taps the beat. Harry, Niall, and Chris help with the ending chants. When it ends, I am relieved, but still want to go on. Everyone claps as I switch spots with Chris. 'Charlie Brown' is beautifully played as always.

Then, Guy suggests, "Chris, let's play 'Yes'."

"Good idea, man, we haven't played that one in ages!" Chris agrees as he leads the band on. The song is good, but Guy made them play it for a reason. Just listen to it. "Saying Lord lead me not into temptation, but it's not easy when she turns you on."

When they finish, Niall has finished his twelfth beer, not being capable of standing on his two feet. Harry mentions, "Before Niall passes out on your couch, I think we better head out."

"Pass....out? Marcel, I-I'm fine!" Niall protests, his head spinning. Nobody can help but laugh.

"It's alright, man, but we need pictures!" Chris states, pulling out his phone. He quickly grabs Harry and me, taking a picture of us smiling. The following poses are taken:

Chris and I duck facing

Chris in my arms like a child (still not surprised)

Will giving me a piggy back ride

Me kissing Will on the cheek

Jonny and I air guitaring

Jonny proposing to me with a guitar pick

Jonny and I hugging, faces touching, smiling

Guy and I... well... posing like a couple would

Guy holding me like a baby

All 6 of us smiling

All 6 laughing

All 6 duck facing

All 6 of 'MTG'ing

When everyone is in a little chat, I find the perfect opportunity to grab my purse from the kitchen. Guy follows me with his disposable camera in hand. We take random selfies like duck faces and crazy/silly ones, smiles, kissing on the cheeks, and finally, he gets me on the lips.

As I walk back to the main room, Jonny sneaks up behind me and snatches me up, "Kiddo, I'm going to miss you!"

"Jonny, I'll miss you too! Please don't be a stranger!" with that, he lets me go, and I go to Will.

He gives me a tiny hug, saying, "Keep writing, dear."

"I will, keep drumming!"

Chris then grabs me and spins me around, "Al, I'm going to miss you, more that J!"

"I'll miss you too, Chris!"

"Write or call or text or something; I'll need a babysitter soon!"

"I will, just keep singing!"

Last is Guy. He opens his arms and I fall into them. "Love, keep in touch," he says.

"I will." "Stay beautiful, keep up the write."

"Of course, as long as you keep playing. Tonight was fun."

"Agreed," he says, snagging me on the cheek before we release. Harry then leads me to the door, dragging Niall along as well.

Before Harry shuts the door, I shout, "Thanks for everything; I love you all!"

"Did you have fun?" Harry asks me as we head into the Jeep, both carrying Niall, who's unconscious. I think for a while and finally come up with the best answer possible, "Yes... yeah I did. Thanks for making me come."


	3. Longer Than Expected Day

As the alarm goes off, I don't want to get up. It's 6 A.M., and that bottle of wine is really taking toll. I have an hour to write a really amazing chapter plus get ready. At 7:15 I'll be leaving to go to a book store for an 8 A.M. book signing. That's go until noon, and then I'd be free

I quickly brush my teeth and put on my fancy new headset that I can speak into, and it will type out the words I say. So later, all I'd have to do is print it. I pick out my outfit too: jean shorts and a Beatles tee. I throw my hair in a braid and continue to speak. Once 7 o'clock comes, the chapter is done and printed. I throw it in an envelope and place it in my bag. After slipping into Converse, I run out the door.

My manager greets me with hot tea and a cream cheese bagel- she must be in a good mood! When she receives the envelope, she looks pleased yet surprised, "Wow, you actually have it done!"

Taking a bite of bagel, I ask, "Don't I normally?"

"Yes, but you were out yesterday," she reminds me, eyebrow raised.

Almost choking, I spit out, "How'd you know?!"

"People don't live under rocks, sweetie, watch this," she explains, handing me her iPhone. My heart aches while my stomach knots, making me feel nauseous. Did anyone catch Guy and me? Who saw and how? What are the consequences?

A news reporter appears on the screen in front of the center where Coldplay performed the night before, announcing, "Last night, L.A. was having a blast as British sensation, Coldplay, took the stage. But right as everything was burning up, things got hotter as One Direction's Harry Styles and Niall Horan along with best-selling author, Alessandra Marino, were thrown in the mix. The group was fairly odd, but according to witnesses, things went surprisingly well."

A girl with blue and blonde hair comes on camera, saying, "It was awesome! Three of my favorite things in pop culture were put together!"

Next, a boy with a Coldplay t-shirt responds, "Yeah, it was incredible, really weird but amazing!"

A group of girls shouts, "We love OneColdRings!"

The news reporter comes back on camera and replies, "OneColdRings! could we see more of this going on in the future? Everyone hopes, to check out the actual performance, go to our website-" Stacy grabs her iPhone back and mentions, "Fans love it. Also, people discovered you were in a band. Would you drop writing for a full time band?"

"No! I'm not very good!" I admit, waiting for her to start the car. 

As we drive off, she includes, "Well, this stuff is good for your social status; so keep it up."

11:50 A.M.

My hand begins to cramp as what feels like the 9 millionth book is signed. A smile is drawn on my face- I probably look high. Yet, I am high, high off of adornment. Fans are the best, all unique, coming together for one thing. I'm just happy to be apart of it.

As a book plops in front of me, I decide to not look up due to a headache. 

"Who should I make this too?" I ask, readying the page.

"You can make it to the best fan ever," a familiar voice responds. When I look up, Guy is standing before me.

"Guy!" I squeal before almost knocking the table over to hug him.

"Al, after you sign this lovely book, would you like to get out of here?" he asks.

"Sure! Hold on!" I answer.

I take the pen and write: Dear the best fan ever, I hope you enjoy this book. You make really good soup, and know how to get a party going. I love your music, and am your biggest fan too! All my love, Alessandra Marino  
P.S. I love you!

As I return the book, I get up, noticing there is no longer a line. I grab my bag, thank the administration, and head out the door with Guy.

The day is hot as Guy and I walk down the block.

"Did you see we're all over the news?" he asks me, slipping on some sunglasses.

I laugh, "Yes, we're supposedly a huge hit named OneColdRings!"

"It's ridiculous; the only good thing about it is that I get a reason for seeing you," he admits, getting crimson. 

"Good because I like seeing you too," I shoot back, feeling cheesy. We both smile and continue walking, "Where exactly are we going?"

"I don't know," he replies.

"Well, I say the beach!" 

"Sounds fun, what do we do there?"

"I don't know, walk around, tan, eat, swim, talk?"

The beach is a good 5 degrees cooler while the tide is low. Soft breezes pass as we walk toward a hot dog stand in the burning sand. 

"And that's the time Chris hit me in the head with a guitar!"

"Wow, I didn't know he gets that crazy!"

"Well, he does, especially after a really good show like yesterday," he mentions. 

"Oh, he didn't seem that bad!" I exclaim, laughing.

"He is! After you left, he asked if we did the do!"

"What'd you say?"

"No, not that lucky," he winks, starting to laugh. I do too, giving him a play punch in the arm. 

We soon take a seat in the sand as we eat. It is nice when people don't recognize you; it's relaxing. 

"So, Guy, what do you think of him?" Guy asks me, like an 8th grade boy. He throws the remainder of his hot dog to the seagulls. 

"I believe he's quite the gentleman, also top of the bass playing community. I have to admit, he's quite the kisser too! Too bad he doesn't think the same of Alessandra," I crack up, feeling goofy. 

His eyebrows shoot up, "Where do I start? Al is one hell of a writer. She can sing and snog and can be an absolutely beautiful and incredible person." Before I know it, his arm is around me, and I lean up against his shoulder.

"Guy! Alex! Look here!" shrilly voices echo behind us. I jump up, knowing exactly who it is: the pops. We both know how this looks, so we run.

The chase us, shouting various questions like:  
"Are you two together?"  
"How long have you been together?"  
"Will you play anymore music?"  
"Al, are you aware Guy is 15 years older?"  
"Guy, what does you ex-wife, band mates, and daughter think of this?"

As we slow down, the catch up. Cameras and people are in our faces. Then, a man grabs my arm and pulls me back. Guy immediately pushes the man back, and puts a protective arm around me- only making the pops rowdier. Thank God we are closer to the car.

When we both are in and buckled, the pops move out of the way, and we drive off.

"Thanks back there; I thought I was a goner when that guy grabbed me," I remark. 

Still driving, he replies, "Any day, but was are we going to tell them? That stuff will be all over within an hour."

"We can say we ran into each other and decided to hand out as friends. Possibly say we were discussing more OneColdRings' stuff," I throw out, hoping that it would work. A few awkward moments pass before I ask, "Where are we going?"

"The hotel/apartment place we're staying at," he says as we pull in, captain obvious.

Inside is the same as yesterday, only brighter and non-taco smelling. Guy leads me to the music room. Bored out of our minds, he grabs his bass and begins to pluck. I recognize the notes, "I remember, we were walking up to strawberry swing." Guy nods at me, a signal to continue.

I continue for the entire song, but once that song is over, he goes straight into another. I love this song, but I never pictured myself singing it to the Guy Berryman.

"No, I don't wanna battle from beginning to end; I don't wanna cycle of recycled revenge; I don't wanna follow death and all of his friends!" I sing this twice, lines that mean a lot more to me than people think. It's actually in one of my books... many people don't know where it came from. 

Guy stops playing, but asks, "Can you sing the end of it?"

I look back, embarrassed of my constant singing, and start, "Sure... and, in the end, we lie awake and dream of making our escape..."

After finishing, I find Guy behind me. He wraps his strong arms around my waist and begins to sway us side to side.

His voice soothes me like honey in tea on a cold winter's night as he hums Paradise's melody. This is followed with him serenading into my ear, "and, in the end, I lie awake and dream of making our escape... I dream of para-para-paradise, every time I see you smile." 

I lean back into his chest and whisper, "Guy, you put a smile upon my face." these remarks feel cheesy, but a pace I can follow.

"Through chaos as it swirls, it's us against the world..."

"Give me real, don't give me fake..."

"Give me strength and self-control..."

I smile as he kisses my head, which finds its way to my neck. I become light-headed, yearning for more as I whisper, "But we were dying of frustration, saying Lord lead me not into temptation..."

He finishes the line in between kisses, "But it's not easy when she turns... you... on..."

Before my stomach explodes, I turn around and kiss back, releasing all my bottled emotions. I jump into his arms, wrapping my legs around his hips. He decides to bring us over to Chris's colorful piano, setting me on top of it. Yet, our lips don't dare to part. The stable instrument allows our intentions to run deeper, the kissed becoming richer and the touches becoming pleasurable. I pull Guy on the multicolored piano with me, hoping it'll stay intact, or we'll have a lot to explain.

Guy eventually finds his way on top of me. He stops kissing me and gazes at me with an amazed look. I stare too, but then wrap my arms around his neck. I lead him back to me, and begin to kiss him with a passionate approach. He slowly slips his hands under my tank to remove it. I smile with satisfaction as I undo his belt.

"Guy? Jonny? Chris?" I hear someone call throughout the condo,

"Shit, it's Will!" Guy panics, sliding off the piano. I stay on, re-positioning my shirt to normal. I see Guy fiddle with his belt as Will calls the names again. 

"In the music room, Will!" Guy shouts out, placing himself to look like he was playing the piano. 

Will walks in, about to speak, but instead cries, "Al!" and hugs me, "Man, this piano is warm, better inform Chris..." I hold in my laughter.

Guy explains, "Well, we've been taking turns on it. It's probably been worked too hard." Will shrugs as Guy winks at me.

"Well, I was just stopping back to drop off some groceries. C'ya, Guy. Good day, Al!" Will finished with another hug and runs out the door.

Once I know Will is gone, I ask, "So we've worked the piano too hard?"

He smiles and states, "Yes, this piano has been worked too hard for purposes it shouldn't be used for!"

"We should try some objects that are made for that purpose- oh my god, that sounded so dumb, I'm sorry!" I beam, laughing it off.

He pulls me in as he's still sitting down, and gently places a kiss on my cheek.

Guy laughs as my face drops. He put a stop on our previous activities after Will decided to leave. Am I boring him? Am I not experienced enough?

“What are we going to do now?” I ask, getting out of his arms.

“Well, we could call up the boys and have another party,” he suggests, rubbing the back of his neck. I can tell he doesn't want that. He barely associated with anyone yesterday.

“You know, I think I’m going to get going,” I say, going to grab my bag.

He looks down and then up at my face, “Don’t leave. Please, not yet.”

“Why not?” 

“Because.”

“Why?”

“I like when you’re here.” The tension becomes unbearable. 

I shake my head and argue, “You have a band with you! The pops were right, you’re too old for me- well not really but still in the public eye! You have a daughter for crying out loud! I’m sorry if I took something the wrong way, but this just can’t happen.” 

Instead of talking back to me as I reach the door, he spins me around and plants one right on my lips. Instead of returning it, I turn back and head out the door. Tears stream down my face when I realize he isn't going to come running after me. I was nothing. Just another toy.


	4. The Fall of Man

Three months later

At the release of my new book, many of my fans have been going crazy, so I’ve been traveling a lot. Book signings are a must in every state and even some countries, causing my travels to Great Britain. Here I am now, sitting at a book store, waiting for my time to be up. 

“Miss, someone is here to see you. They say it’s urgent,” a bodyguard whispers in my ear. I nod, allowing him to bring whoever is here to see me in. I haven’t been myself the past three months. I seemed to have lost my sense of excitement and curiosity. Maybe that’s why my book ended with so much loss and hate. 

“Al, hey!” I hear a familiar voice yell in my ear. Looking up, I see Chris standing in front of me. 

“Hey,” I reply, giving him a quick hug. I haven’t seen Chris since that party that night. Right after I left Guy, I went back to Chicago to write more. 

Chris looks me up and down, obviously seeing my melancholy and exhausted appearance and asks, “What have you been doing lately?”

“Writing books, selling books, signing books; how about you?” I ask, staring to wrap up the table to go.

“Recording music, putting together music, selling music; I have a question for you,” Chris states, seeming to get antsy. 

“Ask away.”  
As soon as the last letter pours out of my mouth, Chris quietly asks, “Did you and Guy… ya know…?”

“No, no we did not sleep together,” I answer, feeling the blood rush to my head.

“Are you sure?”

“Positive! Any more dumb questions?”

“What went on then? Because he hasn’t been the same.”

“A lot went on. A lot that shouldn’t have went on.”

Chris stares at me for a while with his jaw to his chest. I bite my lip, my palms becoming sweaty. Hot tears set in my ducts. Then, he sighs, “I’m sorry. Guy tends to do that, but he never had an aftermath like this. Anyhow, will you watch my kids Saturday night?”

“Sure, where do you live?” I ask, now grabbing my bag.

“Gwyneth or I will get you; I’ll catch you then!” he finishes, kissing me on the cheek and running before I can say goodbye myself.


	5. The Car

Saturday  
I don’t bother dressing up to watch Chris’s children because I don’t feel the need to impress them. They’re kids with innocence; I wish I still had innocence.

As the doorbell rings, I rush to the door, expecting Chris or Gwyn, but all I see is… Guy. He turns pink at the sight of me. Blood rushes to my cheeks as well. 

“Hey,” he chokes, holding the back of his neck.

“Hi… where’s Chris or Gwen?” I ask, attempting to make things less awkward.

He pauses and has to think before answering, “Chris is getting ready, and by the sounds of it, G is helping him… so Chris sent me. He said it would be good for me.”

“Of course he did. Well, let’s get going,” I suggest before I can cry, heading out the door to his car. 

Once we plop inside, the cold sets in. It’s dark and snow is falling. I brought no jacket, figuring it wouldn’t be that bad. Guy beings to drive, leaving me to the radio.

I twist the knob of the radio, hoping to find something normal. Passing a song, Guy grabs the knob and twists it back, touching my fingers. A bolt of energy passes through me, my heart skipping a beat. Instead of letting go, we both keep our fingers on the knob for several seconds until he removes his. Silence still lingers between us as we drive down the back roads of England. 

“So, a new book?” he asks, eyes on the road.

“Yes, but you can’t read it.”

“Why not?”

“Because you haven’t finished my first series…”

“Maybe I did…”

With hope, I turn my head to him and gasp, “No way!”

He smiles, eyes still on the road, “Yes way! I literally finished it yesterday!”

I laugh until a song comes on the radio, a very familiar song: Fix You.

After the first verse and refrain, Guy turns it down and asks, “What happened to us, exactly?”

“We fought and I left.”

“Detail.”

“We were in the middle of something, and Will walked in. After he left, I tried to keep going, and you said no. I didn’t understand so I asked why. You wouldn’t answer so I just came up with a bunch of reasons and left. I went back to Chicago the next day,” I explain, getting quiet with every other word. 

“That’s not cool,” he responds with a grin on his face.

“I know it’s not. We need to fix it.”

“Agreed, but how?”

“Why didn’t you continue after he left?”

“Because.”

“Why?”

He sighs before saying, “Because you were too good to do that with right away.”

“Oh…”

“Yes, I thought we could have something real, not just…”

“se-“

“Yes, that… you are really cool and nice and funny and I wanted to be with you… I still want too.”

“Well…”

“I know, it isn’t appropriate-“

“Yes it is because I feel the same way,” I whisper. The rest of the ride remains silent.


	6. The Car Part 2

The car makes a sudden turn into a parking space along a giant house, obviously the Martin's. From my last statement, Guy is in shock, a worried smile drawn across his face. He continuously glances at me; his dark eyes twinkling in the moonlight. 

As we come to a stop, Guy turns off the ignition, but doesn't get out. He just sits and stares out the window.

"Is there anything you want to talk about before we go inside?" I ask, gripping the door handle. He then turns towards me. Before I can say anything more, he he pulls me towards him and gently kisses me on the lips. After letting go, I look back at him. He was the reason for my lack of gratitude and liveliness. I missed him. 

Instead of exiting the car, I pull him back to me, meeting lips once more. I feel his left hand grab at my waist to pull me closer while his right hand sifts thought my hair. We end up in the driver's seat; my legs wrapped around his waist, my back against the steering wheel. The kissing and touching become almost unbearable as time goes on. Becoming out of breath, I pull away, but Guy keeps going, trailing to my neck and collar.

I can't take it anymore, I begin to beg in his ear, "please, please, please..."

Instead of stopping or denying my request, he takes it farther. He reclines the seat back and stops everything, leaving me awkwardly sitting on top of him.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asks me, putting his hands behind his head.

"Positive," I respond, trying to act sure of myself.

"Okay, well, you better be ready for some hard love."

"Why?"

"Because you turn me on," he assures before pulling me back to him. Our lips move rhythmically as his hands slide up and down my back. Our hips thrust together, making me wonder what it'll be like with no clothes on. Then, I decide to start the real deal.

We're in a pretty small car, and he's wearing dress clothes. I choose not to make a mess, so I begin to undo his buckle. As I do this, he unbuttons my blouse, revealing my bra. He chooses not to remove this, but gropes and kissed them as he undoes my pants.

The night feels colder once I lack my lower garments. Since he is older and more experienced, I allow him to be on top. 

"Guy..."

"Yes?"

"I'm scared."

"Don't be."

"Does it... hurt?"

"On your part, in the beginning, yes, but if it's real love, it'll feel better as it goes on." 

"Stay with me," I beg, gripping the back of his neck.

He looks me in the eyes and promises, "I will." We kiss a few more times before I begin to feel. Something hard and detailed enters me, sending chills down my spine. A few times with more depth starts to cause pain, forcing me to moan. 

"Guy!" I finally yell once; the pain feels like fire. He just grabs me tighter, forcing more and more in. 

"Guy! Guy! Guy! Goddammit!" I scream as I feel my nails dig into his back.

"It's... it's... alight," I hear Guy mutter. A feel a sensational feel, like someone is massaging a sore muscle for the first time.

"Oh..." I moan, starting to move with him. He laughs in satisfaction. A few more ins and outs, and Guy lets out a moan and pulls out for the last time. He rolls off of me and stares at the ceiling with a stupid smile. I probably look the same. 

When we catch out breath, we look at each other and laugh. Guy grabs my hand and asks, "How do you feel?"

"Really good," I admit.

"That was the best I've ever had," he lets out. 

I sigh and say, "I'm happy we both has a good time."

As I'm buttoning my blouse back up, I realize why I'm here. I quickly throw on the rest of my clothes and hop out of the car.

"Where are you going?" Guy asks, attempting to get up.

"I have to babysit Apple and Moses! You have an award show!" I remind him. 

His eyes go wide as he tells me, "Go ahead, I'll be there soon. Make up something to tell Chris!" After this, I sprint towards the Martin's. 

When I reach the door, it's already open so I walk inside. Gwyneth comes to the door. We silently greet each other. Before Chris comes, she brushes her fingers through my hair and applies cover-up to my neck. Then, she whispers, "I won't tell Chris, but I need the details later!" I thank her as Chris walks in. 

"Hey Al! Um... where's Guy?"

"He locked his shoes in the trunk. He told me to go while he was getting them out," I cover. 

"Well, the kids are watching T.V. Just make sure they behave," Chris informs.

"We should get going; thank you so much!" Gwyneth says, giving me a hug. Chris does the same, and closes the door behind him. 

Before I can lock it, someone barges through, nearly knocking me over.

"Al?" I hear Guy ask. 

I jump out from behind the door and make him jump. "Yes?"

Instead of asking, he yells out beyond me, "Cinderella dressed in yella!" I raise an eyebrow before I hear Apple shout, "Glass slipper?"

"It fits!" Guy shouts. I laugh until he takes my face in his hands and pulls it close to his. We stare each other down until he brings me in for a kiss. It lasts for a while, gentle and passionate.

When I hear tiny footsteps trail across the hardwood floor, I pull away. He hugs me from behind, laying his head on my shoulder.

"Don't you have an award show to attend?" I ask, turning to face him.

"Don't you have monsters to watch?" 

"You should seriously get going though! Good luck!" I say.

"Luck is for losers; I have you," he replies, kissing me on the cheek and dashing out the door.

When I turn away from the door, I find two small figures standing before me.


	7. The Book Princess

Apple squeaks, "Hi!" while her brother hides behind her.

"Hey! I'm ; I'm your babysitter I guess," I starts, "What are your names?"

"I'm Apple," the little girl replies. Her brother takes a while but eventually answers, "Moses."

"Are you guys hungry at all?" I ask. They both nod their heads and race towards the kitchen. I follow them; the house is huge, and I don't know my way around yet. When I arrive, I can see they have already found what their mother left them (I know how strict her diet with them is). They also prefer juice, so I make myself hot chocolate and sit down at the table with them. 

Moses eats really fast as Apple takes her time. He also babbles on about trucks, reminding me of my little brother when we were younger. Apple just sits and stares at me until she asks, "Are you the book princess?"

"Pardon?" I respond, not sure if she was talking to me.

She repeats, "The princess... are you the book princess?"

A smile creeps across my face as well as hers when I ask, "What makes you think that?"

"Uncle talks about a book princess... he gave me a book about her with drawings and everything!"

"Uncle?" I recall Chris having brothers...

"My uncle Guy; he's not really my uncle though..."

Moses pipes in, "He plays the bass in daddy's band!"

I nod and say, "I know uncle Guy... he's pretty cool!"

Apple's face brightens as I say this, gets up, and starts running while saying, "I'll get you my book! You can read it to us!" Before I can resist, she is already gone. 

When she returns, she grabs my hand and leads me to a room up the stairs. A bed rests in the corner, surrounded by toys. I ask where we are, and she tells it as the play room. That makes sense now.

"Will you read now?" Apple asks me, plopping on my lap like I'm her mother.

"I don't think I should... you should let uncle Guy read it to us later," I suggest, trying to hand the book back. Moses then mopes in the room, looking tired as can be.

"I have a deal for you... if you brush your teeth and ready yourselves for bed, I'll read," I manage, holding out a hand. Apple and Moses fall for it, shaking my hand, and racing to the washroom. 

They make it back in two minutes. This time, we move to the bed, snuggling under the covers as I lay in the middle with the book.

I quickly scan the book- it has small words for Moses and pictures and love for Apple. I start from the beginning, "The book princess by Guy Berryman, illustrated by Apple and Guy- maybe Moses." The dedication pages says, "for Apple and Moses- let their imagination run wild for good children get the best. <3 uncle Guy. Also to the book princess- so she might read this and love me back one day, once more." The date is from a month ago, when we weren't talking.

Apple looks up at me with pleading eyes, just like her brother. I flip the page and read, "Once upon a time there was a famous book princess. She was the prettiest princess, everything the bassist wanted."

Before I can turn the page, Apple points at the picture and explains, “This is why I think you’re the book princess… he describes you whenever I ask him what the bassist wants!”

“Don’t be silly, Apple! Let’s read on…” I flip the page, “One day this princess took a break from writing and went to a Coldplay concert. This concert was different though. Chris saw her and brought her backstage with her friend, Harry Styles and Niall Horan. They agreed to sing a song with them. But something the way the bassist and the princess looked at each other caused a spark.” On this page is a real picture of all backstage, probably taken by Guy before the show? You can see everyone, but you can tell the kids drew on it. One of Apple’s hearts surrounds me, even if I can’t see my face. 

I turn the page and read, “Towards the end of the show, Coldplay brings them out. The book princess is dressed up as the princess of China. The crowd goes wild as she sings with Chris. The bass players feels a spark as she walks around him, making blood rush to his head.” I feel my cheeks go red as the real picture from the show appears on the page. I’m still unrecognizable to the kids, but my question would be ‘why did he makes this for the kids?’. Did he know I’d eventually read to them?

“Aren’t you going to read more? I hear Apple ask me. She even has to tug on my arm for me to begin again. 

When I turn the page, I read, “The show goes out with a bang. As the last song ends, the book princess screams from the crowd, ‘I love you, Guy!’ The bass player ignores it, believing his hearing is messed up.”

I go to flip the page, but Apple closes the book. She shows me that little Moses has fallen asleep, so we won’t wake him. 

I gently pick him up and head to his room. Once I tuck him in and close the door behind me, I stand in front of wide awake Apple. 

“Can you speak Spanish?” she asks me.

“No, I can speak French though,” I reply.

“I can’t so let’s continue English.”

“Alright, what do you want to do, Miss Apple?”

A wide smile appears on her face, “Play music!” She then leads me to her own room where a guitar and keyboard lay. 

“I want a bass, but Uncle Guy wants me to learn the guitar before I do,” she explains, picking up the guitar and handing it to me, “Can you play any of my daddy’s songs?”

“Of course, your dad’s band is my favorite band!” I say taking the guitar. The walls seem sound proof, so I begin to strum, feeling if she’ll recognize it.

“I used to rule the world!” she begins singing, mimicking how her father dances on stage.

After many songs and lessons on playing, Apple finally grows tired. I play slower songs as she climbs under her covers and adjusts her stuffed animals. Then, she whispers, “Can you play Us Against the World… my dad normally plays it before I go to bed.”

“Okay, this is the last song though, alright?”

“Yes, but can you sleep with me too? Mommy will do it sometimes…?”

“Sure, sounds good,” I answer to her final request. I softly strum the guitar, making the intro longer. As I sing the first verse, I head the door open fully. Expecting Moses, I still play but turn. Instead, I see the bassist.

He slowly walks over to the bed, and takes a seat next to me. I see a little smile cross Apple’s face as he grabs her hand. She is nearly out of it, about to doze off. 

Guy joins in singing all the way until the song is over. By now, Apple is deep in her dreams, cuddling a stuffed elephant. Guy takes my hand and leads me downstairs to the kitchen. 

As he makes us coffee, he asks, “So how do you like the little monsters?”

“They’re really fun… they made me read a book to them,” I bring up. He hands my coffee to me and takes a seat. 

“A book?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes, a book,” I reply, grinning down at my coffee, too embarrassed to look him in the eyes.

“What kind of book?” he questions, tapping the side of his mug.

I laugh and begin, “Well, I only read half I would say, Moses fell asleep before I could finish. It was about a band, primarily written in the bassist’s point of view, about falling in love with a book princess.”

“Oh… shit… what do you think of it?” he asks, scooting his chair closer to mine.

“I thought it was cute, but who is this book princess you write of?” I ask him, taking a sip of coffee.

“Well, she’s a very amazing and talented young women who makes me happy. We’ve actually just made up, and she’s given me all… I love her,” he explains, grabbing my hand on the counter.

All smiles, I ask in curiosity, “Where’s Chris and Gwyneth and everyone else?” 

“Um, Will and Johnny went straight home because their multiple children, and Chris and Gwyneth said they have some errands to run as they dropped me off. And I don’t think I have to explain was errands mean in this situation…”

“Se-“

“Yes! That! Why do you always say that word?” he asks laughing, looking more embarrassed than me.

I laugh back, saying, “I don’t know! It’s just like any other word- I could say banana or ring or doughnut, and no one would freak out over it!”

As he almost spits his coffee out with laughter, he goes on, “Bananas and doughnuts and rings! You are mad!”

“I’m just rational! I’m honest with this! Literally, I think I could say out loud with my rights as an American that you and I had se-“

“Stop!” Guy put his hand over my mouth, still laughing hysterically.

“Saying that we did that will not make me feel as special as I do from that moment!” his voice lowers to a murmur as he says, “Sex is just a stupid word for intercourse; I prefer love.”

I sit there staring into his eyes as I begin to think. I then say, “Guy, you are a classy man with your fancy words and I respect that. You make me feel special and important, and I will say straight to your face right now that I love you.”

His mouth twists into an intriguing grin as he says, “I love you too.” Back to me. 

I slide out of my seat and explain, “Well, I promised an adorable little girl that I would sleep with her once she fell asleep, and I believe I should keep that promise because she behaved more as a friend than a child.”

Yet, Guy still follows me up the stairs and into Apple’s room. I lay at her side, but not too close, for I’m not her parent. I stay above the covers. Guy then slips next to me above the covers, putting an arm around my waist. We lay there silent as we hear Apple’s long deep breaths. 

“Guy,” I whisper into the darkness.

“Yes?”

“I want to tell you something, but no judging, alright?”

“Go on.”

“I want children now.”

“Children? Like the little things that sit inside you for nine months and come out, and then you have to raise them?”

“Yes, those. I want a million.”

“You better get cracking then, if you want that many. Have mercy on your uterus.”

“Well, not necessarily a million, maybe four or five.”

“I have one, and she’s a handful. I couldn’t imagine five of her…”

“But you love her, right?”

“I love her with all my might. If I could, I’d be with her right now, but I can’t.”

I turn over to face him and ask, “Why not?”

“My job. I’m traveling constantly, and if not, I’m working with the boys on music.”

“So? She’s your daughter. You made her, and you should be with her.”

“Well, it’s not very easy. You’ll see eventually, when you have kids of your own.”

“Alright, that won’t be for a while though.”

“You’re right on that. Make sure, when the time is right, you have children with someone you love and who you think will raise them right.”

“Alright, I think I’ve found the right person then.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah, but I don’t think he’s ready to have any more children as of the moment. And I’m so young, I shouldn’t even be loving yet.”

“Did you just verb that sort of ‘love’?” 

“Yes…”

“Anyways, you are right. You’re too young for that. The person is probably ready though; he’d do anything for you. He loves you after all.”

After this, nothing more is said. As I find myself in his arms, I quickly doze off, just as the little girl did hours ago. Maybe I am somewhat like a child afterall.


	8. See You Soon

I swear, not even two hours later, Guy shakes me. I wake up, and see Chris and Gwyneth in the doorway, smiling. I quickly get up, and walk out the door. Chris whispers thanks to me as Gwyneth sits at her daughter’s bedside, wiping the hair out of her face. 

Once downstairs, Chris has ordered pizza. He guides us to the living room, where we take a seat. 

“So, Al, how were my kids?” Chris asks.

“They were perfect! They listen and are very outgoing. Well, Apple was outgoing, Moses is a bit shy,” I reply.

By this time, Gwyneth is downstairs with us. She calls me into the kitchen to help her with something. Guy let’s go of my hand that he is holding, a sign that it will be alright to leave.

As the kitchen door shuts behind me, Gwyneth has a smile across her face.

“What can I help you with?” I ask, taking a seat on the stool I was on earlier.

“First, thank you for caring for my kids. Secondly, you promised me details, so spill,” she reminds me, taking a seat where Guy originally sat.

After giving her a detailed description of went on in Guy’s car, she is laughing, but not rudely.

“How old are you again?” she asks me.

“Twenty and over a half,” I reply, grinning back at her.

“Lord, please tell me this was your first time ever.”

“Oh, it was! Don’t worry! Guy kind of broke my promise with myself though… I wanted to wait until I was married.”

“Well, I guess it just happens. Chris and I weren’t married when Apple was produced. We got married, and right after, we found out I was with Apple. There, I got lucky because the tabloids will eat you alive!”

“Tell me about it. I know you’re an actress and get that all the time, but I’m new to this. There were rumors going around that Harry Styles and I were dating, but then they saw me with Guy at the beach that one day. Then, they released that, but no one believed it, thank God.”

“Geez, they are out for you! My spotlight days for them are over! The last rumor from them was that Chris and I were divorcing…”

“That’s terrible!”

“I know, but you just have to soak it in and realize all of it is twisted around to make you look bad. The worst part of it though is that a lot of it is false,” she explains, handing me a bowl of salsa. She grabs the chips and leads me out the door with her.

Everyone ends up in solid conversation for an hour or so, I loose count after the third glass of wine. I am bubbly, feeling light as air. Chris is the only one who hasn’t drank the wine, and I’m happy he hasn’t- he’ll tell me all the shit I did tomorrow when I wake with a pounding headache. I also realize I am still underage some point in the night because I throw my phone across the room so I won’t drunk text. Guy keeps me at his side so I won’t kill myself by falling over, while Gwyneth laughs at my transformation. 

“Well, I call it a night, how about you?” Chris asks us all, eating the last piece of pizza. Gwyn and I are having a laugh attack over Guy’s last story about Chris going crazy at a recent concert. 

Guy tightens his grip around my waist and agrees, “Yes, but Chris, neither of us can drive anywhere…”

“Sleep in the guest room, bro, you’ve helped me so many times before,” Chris says before he jogs up the stairs. Gwyneth runs after him, eventually jumping on his back. They laugh as the tumble over, but get right back up to run to their room. 

“Are you ready to go to bed?” Guy asks me.

I think about it and finally come to, “Yeah!”

“Good,” he says to me as takes me on his back as well. The stairs seem shorter than usual, and Guy finds the guest room with no problem. It’s like an average house’s master bedroom.

Somehow, we both get ourselves ready for bed in no time with no trouble. I come out of the bathroom last, finding Guy laying on the bed, staring at the ceiling. His hands are behind his head, and he pays no attention to me as I walk over.

I feel a rush inside of me, an urge that I can’t even describe. I climb on the bed, and on top of him. A smile creeps across his face, but he doesn’t look at me. To invoke my wants, I begin to kiss him, hoping for somekind of response.

When I go to unbutton his shirt, he stops me. He sits up and smiles shyly at me. My face must show disappointment, because the next thing he says, almost in slow motion, is, “Nothing against you, but no, I can’t right now.”

“Why not?” fumbles out of my mouth. Rejection is never good on my part.

“You are absolutely hammered… which isn’t bad, but it isn’t very good,” he explains, flipping me over to the other side of him. Great, not only am I rejected, but I am also removed.

“But, but, I want to!” I argue.

“No! I cannot! I will never love anyone when they are totally drunk. You won’t remember it! You might not even want it to happen tomorrow!” he explains further, taking my hand.

“I will remember! Anything with you, I will remember! Like earlier, we both said we love each other!” I persuade, squeezing his hand.

Guy sighs and says, “The final answer is no, but we can cuddle…?”

“Fine,” I reply, something is better than nothing. I scoot closer to him as he puts his arm around me. I bury my face into his chest as he strokes my back. Sooner than I expect, I pass out, the last memory of sound is him singing yellow. I smile.

 

The next morning, I don’t wake up with a headache, but with little feet stomping all over me. Apple and Moses have taken the privilege of waking us up. They jump and shout to us until we both are up. Guy then grabs Moses and puts him between us.

“So, you want this every morning?” Guy asks me, tickling his ‘nephew’.

I laugh as Apple jumps on top of me, “Yes, it’d be my honor!” 

“You must be mad,” he replies, just staring at me with a smirk on his face. Moses and Apple get up and run to what seems their parent’s room. I feel Guy roll closer to me as sit up and stretch.

“Good morning,” he says before planting one on my lips.

“Good morning to you too,” I reply, not really wanting to get out of bed. He pulls me back down by him, and we just lay there for what seems a life time. It’s nice, not worrying about anything or anyone, just what I like. 

“So, what do you want to do today?” he asks, beginning to stroke my back.

“Ahh, well, I have to get back to America… believe it or not, my book’s movie is coming out!” I answer, getting out of bed.

“Really?” he questions me, following me down the stairs. 

I turn and respond, “Yes, I do, and I can’t miss it. It’d be like you missing a concert!”

He grabs my hand and explains, “Can I at least drive you?”

“Sure, just make sure I get there by eleven…” I look at the clock, “Shit! I have two hours! We need to leave right now! CHRIS, GWYNETH, I HAVE TO GO! I HAVE A PLANE TO CATCH! THANKS A LOT FOR EVERYTHING AND SEE YOU SOON!”


	9. Hopeful Transmission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the big jump forward and the sudden posting! I'll try to be more consistent! Enjoy :)

******** 15 months later********

“You are so weird,” he says as we leave the theater.

I laugh and explain, “So?! If Chris can jump and scream and fall into the crowd, I believe I can say what I want!”

“You literally said to the crowd that you’re leaving Chris and coming for the bassist because he’s sexy!” 

“It’s a true statement! And it’s not a shock to society that we are a thing!” 

He turns me around and says, “I am happy we are a thing,” as he kisses me softly on the cheek. The door then opens, and the press comes in our faces with their cameras and microphones.

“Al that was quite the statement out there!”

“For entertainment of the awesome and dedicated fans!” I say out. Then, I feel Guy’s fingers lace with mine.

“Guy and Alessandra, it has been over a year and a half! What will you do with yourselves?”

“Al, is it true you’re pregnant with his baby?”

“Al, are you permanently in the singing career?”

“Is your new book about the struggles of your new life with Guy?”

“Guy, when will you pop the question?”

By this time, we reach the car and speed off. This has been my life for eight months, since we released our secret with the public. And no, I am definitely not pregnant or engaged or married! I’ve been singing with Coldplay, Harry, and Niall on special occasions because the fans adore OneColdRings. I still write, and I still do all my things with my books. The second book in my popular series has just released its movie, which is very successful. Coldplay’s touring is coming to an end, where they will begin to produce their new album. 

As for Guy and I, we still love each other. We’ve moved into each other’s homes, depending on if we’re in America, Scotland, England, or Italy. Keeping in touch is key to our healthy relationship. One phone call a night is good, but seeing each other is even greater. And, no, I still do not have my million children. I met Guy’s daughter, Nico, though. His ex-wife doesn’t mind me either, which drains my worries by 150%. 

The next morning, Guy drags me out to the beach. It’s a pretty morning, the sun is just rising on Ireland’s coast. We normally sleep in, but this is a new place for us. He likes adventure, I’d say.

As we sit on the edge of a cliff together, he begins to ask me all sorts of questions:

“So, do you still want children?”

“Yeah, I’d say so, but not a million… four or five is the max.”

“Do you still want a dog?”

“Of course, we should get one!”

“What are your favorite names for a girl?”

“Katrina, Clove,”

“Boy?”

“Will, Jonathan, Michael, Ryan”

“Do you like your homes?”

“Yes, they’re all so lovely. Thank you for moving in with me, and vice versa.”

“Would you consider yourself financially secured?”

“Definitely”

He then turns me to face him while he grabs my hand, “Do you love your life?”

“Most certainly!”

“Do you feel anything is missing still?”

“At times, yes… why so?”

“So you love me?” 

“Yes…”

“Are you sure?”

“Mhm…”

“Positive?”

“Yes! I love you! Do you love me?” I ask back, standing up in security.

He gets up with me and takes a deep breath. He looks at the ground and back up at my face. The sun is nearly up, half way there. I then ask again, choking in my voice, “Do you love me?”

No response. I then feel tears coming. This is it. He’s going to break it off. I’ve been through this before. I whisper for a last time, looking him straight in the eyes with a quivering lip, “God dammit, do you love me?”

He looks as if he’s going to cry himself. Then, he takes my hand and finally says, “Alessandra Marie, you have impacted my life like no other women…”, he reaches into his pocket, pulling out a velvet box, “And, I’m going to be honest when I say, I want to spend the rest of my life with you because you are perfect and beautiful…” he falls to the ground on his right knee, finally saying, “Will you marry me?”

I feel a tear roll off my cheek as I choke on my, “yes”. He takes the ring out of the box I didn’t even notice he opened, and slips it on my left hand ring finger. The jem twinkles in the rising sun.

When he rises, I wrap my arms around him as tight as I can and cry my eyes out. My heart races with thoughts of our past and future, causing me not to think straight. I whisper, “I love you so much, you have no idea…”

“I think I do,” as he holds me back, putting his chin on my head, kissing the top of my head. 

When I look back up at him, I grab his face and kiss him, just filled with joy. He laughs at me, not really understanding my joy. 

“You are insane,” he tells me as we walk down the cliff.

“How?” I ask, grabbing his hand.

He sighs, then laughs, “You agreed to marry me!”

“Yeah! I’d say that you are insane for asking me to marry you!”

We start to laugh, not realizing our commitment is serious, but a game. 

When we get back to the cottage, I ask, “Wait, don’t we have to tell people?” I then walk to the counter, about to make some soup.

He comes behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist, an answers, “Well, they don’t have to know…”

“But wouldn’t it be nice…?” I ask, trying to get the can opener. It doesn’t work well, especially when he begins to kiss my neck.

He stops for a moment and whispers, “If you want a million children, shouldn’t we start now?”

I laugh, “You’re right, you are crazy! But it wouldn’t hurt to start…”

With this said, he immediately begins to kiss me, harder than usual. I jump into his arms, my legs wrapped around his waist. He then pushes me into a wall, squeezing me against it. “Room,” I manage out, and he automatically stumbles with me in his arms to there. The door closes behind him.

****

Hours beyond hours of pure enjoyment comes to an end with a knocking on the outside door. 

“Fu-“ I hear Guy muffle into the pillow before getting up. I still lay under the covers, not wanting to follow him up. A few moments later, he runs back into the room and says, “You better get dressed!”

“Why?” I groan into the pillow. I’m flushed.

“The boys are here…” he answers, throwing a shirt on.

I roll over and say, “Tell them I said hello, but I am most definitely not getting out of this bed until it is absolutely necessary.”

“They have good news…” he teases me with, plopping down next to me. I sigh and continue to lay down. He puts his arm around me and kisses me on my bare shoulders.

“Fineee… I’ll be out in a minute,” I reply. He jumps up and runs out of the room, almost forgetting to close the door behind him.After a few moments to myself, I finally walk outside. All the boys greet me in the front room, looking very anxious.

“Hi everyone!” I say, surprised. How did they know we were here?

Chris pipes up and asks, “So Guy told us you have exciting news…. Are you pregnant?”

The entire room goes dead silent as everyone waits for my answer. I finally decide to say, “No, I am most certainly not! But I am engaged!”

They all laugh when Chris says, “Harry finally got some balls and asked! Geez, Guy must be furious!” I laugh along with them, holding back my tears though. 

Will then says, “Past all the joking though, congratulations!” 

“Yes, really, we’ve been waiting for this moment for ages!” Johnny concludes, getting up to hug me. 

I accept the warm congrats with open arms, but not my mind. There is something I still haven’t ever told Guy, and now, I am regretting it. I feel guilty and ashamed. He won’t have a clue until I tell him. If he gets mad and leaves, I will understand, but still be heartbroken.

After the boys leave and it’s just me and Guy once more, I decide to be brave. I sit him down and make us tea, trying to make the atmosphere a tad calmer. He then asks, “So, what did you think of the boys’ surprise visit?”

“I thought it was very thoughtful, they’re great friends,” I reply, taking a sip of my tea.

He then sets his tea down and starts, “So, I’ve been thinking a lot lately…” I nod for him to continue and he does, “and I think we should get started on a family, but not until after we’re married…”

“When did you start this idea?” I ask, stiffening at the suggestion.

He looks down and then back up at me, “I began thinking seriously about it when Chris asked if you were pregnant, and the idea of having a family again made me feel like air.”

That’s when I begin to cry. The tears come almost instantly, the emotion overruling my mind. Guy begins to panic and immediately comes by my side to comfort me by saying, “Hey, hey, hey, we don’t have to start a family right away if you don’t want too… we can start earlier or later, it doesn’t matter. As long as you’re happy!”

This just makes me cry even harder, not being able to control my own breathing. After five minutes of pure crying, I finally manage to choke out, “Guy, I have to tell you something.”

“Yes, please, say anything… I just don’t understand what’s going on!” he begs, looking as if he’s suffering just as much as I am. Too bad I’m about to make it even worse.

I begin, “You just promise not to get totally pissed at me… not to throw anything… if you get upset, just leave, and if you don’t mind then screw my overthinking!”

“Fine, I promise, just tell me!” he begs once more, holding me in his arms.

“Well, you know how Chris asked if I’m pregnant?”

“Yes, are you pregnant?!”

“No! Well, not anymore…”

His face turns slightly confused, “wait, what?”

“Do you remember the first time we… um…?”

“Yeah… I remember it as clear as daylight.”

I go on, holding back all my tears to say, “After that I didn’t feel the same, in means of physical health, I was getting sick constantly. So that’s when I visited the doctor… and he told me that I was pregnant.”

“What?!” Guy shouts in shock, not believing me.

“And I was only a month in! But then one day, when I was two months in, I just felt a terrible stomach pain… and the next thing I know, the baby’s gone,” I blurt out, starting to sob again. Instead of comforting me like he was, Guy sits there with a blank stare towards the wall in front of us. Then, he gets up, and walks outside.

This makes me even more depressed. I fall into the couch face first, and scream into it. Taking a pillow, I throw it across the room, not knowing how to express my anger towards myself. I lost a child. I lost a child that its father didn’t even know existed. I feel more tears coming, and not knowing anything else to do, I mope back into my room, and fall asleep.


	10. Fix You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm so so so so so sorry... school's almost over now, so I will start posting regularly now :) 
> 
>  
> 
> *** GHOST STORIES IS OUT TOMORROW! GO PICK UP A COPY! IT'S AMAZING!

I wake up screaming, still alone. When I get out of bed and go into the living room, I find Guy, sitting and staring at the same wall with the same blank expression. Instead of letting him know I’m there, I pretend I don’t see him, and walk back, until he says, “Come here, please.”

I leisurely walk over to him, until I find myself sitting next to him. Instead of getting yelled at or scowled toward, he puts his arm around me. The room is dark, the only light entering is the moonlight. Light breezes come through the open window. His face now reads curiosity, yet a slight sadness.

He then speaks, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Becau-”

“Please just tell me before I ball my eyes out like you did hours ago.”

“I didn’t tell you because I was scared. I was scared of putting that on your shoulders- being a parent is obviously a huge responsibility. I was going to tell you when I hit three months, but that never happened.”

“I’m sorry… that must have hurt you so much. If I would’ve known, I would’ve been behind you 100%”

“It’s alright, I moved past it. I’m just scared to try again. The pain was intolerable. Like most women that happens too, I had to talk to someone professional about it so I wouldn’t do anything stupid.”

Dead silence comes between us as he cradles me in his arms. 

He then speaks once more, “Was it a boy or girl?”

“Boy,” I reply, trying not to cry again, but the thought of a child with us in that moment made me think even further.

He kisses my forehead, “Which names were you thinking of?”

“Jonathan or William…”

“What happened to Ryan?” he asks me with a smile across his face. I smile too- I can’t stay sad forever.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you though,” I apologize, squeezing his hand.

“Its fine, you probably made the right decision. I would’ve panicked…” he admits, but goes on to say, “But I’m ready now.”

“I’m still scared-“

“Hey!” he says, holding my face in his hands, “You’ll make a great mother.”

I grin to him, feeling weight lift off my shoulders. He pulls my face to his, and says, “When we get home, I have a giant surprise for you.”

I stay where he has me and reply, “Oh really?”

“Yes, and I have the best feeling that you’re going to love it.”

“Mhm?”

“But before we go home, I have one more surprise.”

“You’ve given me enough though!” I say, my nose touching his.

“This surprise isn’t that big though!”

“But-!” but before I can say more, he presses his lips to mine, slowly, much differently than what we normally do. When I try picking up the pace, he steadies me, lightly holding my waist. I know what I want to do… but he doesn’t seem interested. We just sit together, kiss, and talk. It is nice.


	11. Yellow

The next day, we find ourselves at our home in England, God only knows where that is. Guy normally leads me around this town of his, and even after months of living here, I still don’t know where the grocery is!

As we step inside, Guy calls out, “Hey! Will, are you still here!”

No response. Guy then covers my eyes with his hands and leads me up the stairs to our room. I smell a mixture of wet paint and something else that I can’t put my finger on. Then finally, he lets his hands drop as we walk in.

The walls are pitch black, darker than the night itself. But then, Guy switches the lights off, and a glow appears in the middle of the ceiling. It’s the globe from their album Parachutes, shining so brightly with the same yellow that is on the cover. My eyes begin to water; he's known my love for that shade of yellow ever since we met. We walk over to the bed and lay down on our backs, just admiring the globe. Then, Guy flips another switch, and a bunch of small, realistic stars shine out of nowhere. A gasp escapes my mouth- they're paper origami ones with faint yellow lights inside them. 

“Do you like it?” he whispers to me as I gaze at the walls around us.

I eventually stutter, “They’re p-perfect…”


	12. Wedding Bells

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter was so short, and I still feel bad so here.
> 
> *** Ghost Stories is amazing! Go and get a listen today!

I shake all over as six people constantly pick and poke at me. The back of my hometown’s church is steaming hot, especially for early May. Yet, it’s probably my anxiety. I haven’t seen Guy since yesterday, and let’s just say today is a huge transformation…

Then, everyone begins to line up. My stomach turns as I see Will and Michelle run down the aisle with no music, for they are coordinating it. Will sits at the piano as Michelle grabs her guitar, and they begin to play Life in Technicolor. Guy has no say so in the music I guess…

As everyone takes turns walking down the aisle, a small panic bursts inside of me. What if something goes wrong? What if I fall on my face? What if he doesn’t cry? What if this doesn’t last? But then, my friend, Joe, grabs my arm, a signal to go. 

Will decides to change the song even when I didn’t tell him too. Yet, it’s a song I always wanted to be played at this event- Postcards from Far Away. Everyone goes silent as I being to walk down the aisle. It’s a shame my father can’t do it with me, so I chose my best guy friend. He’ll be shipped overseas soon, so I thought this would be a great last for the both of us. 

In a good range now, I see him, Guy. He’s dressed to the nines, even better than when he attends his fancy award shows. The funny part of this is that his bandmates are dressed in their Viva La Vida apparel, the ones they wore when performing. I laugh at Chris, even though Guy is beginning to tear up.

The rest is honestly history. We held hands and gave vows as we looked in one another’s eyes with compassion and love. Our hearts beat in sync, God’s wonder and awe looking down upon us. The ceremony ended with a perfect kiss, and a rocking reception.

Then, Guy and I went off to Scotland to get married in front of his family. Here, Nico was our little flower girl, and all the boys were there once more, cracking jokes like, “I swear, this happened yesterday!” Nico also ended up catching my flowers, whereas Will’s little girl caught the other. Guy’s family was just as happy as mine, with full consent.

Our honeymoon took place, of course, in Georgia. I always pestered Guy about how beautiful it was when I went there as a teenager. He never showed interest until then. We stayed in a small shack on Tybee Island beach, where it was warm and wet. The two week trip consisted of the ocean, boardwalks, and a lot of bedtime… neither of us minded either of the three.


	13. All Your Friends

***1 month later***

“So two months you’ll be away?” I ask, just making sure I heard the time frame correctly for this tour.

“Yes, two months, hun,” Guy says as we approach the front door. Of course, we won’t be separated for two months, I’ll be able to meet him half way through. It’s a part of the family deal Phil Harvey got for all of the boys.

As I hand him his last case, I let out, “I’ll miss you.”

“I sure hope you will because I’ll miss you too. It’ll be a long month without you… I’ll have to take care of myself, you know!” he admits, placing his hands on the sides of my hips.

“Yes, you’re screwed! But, you’ll call me, right?”

“Of course I will,” he replies, now kissing my cheek.

“You packed everything?” I ask, thinking more than doing.

“Mhm,” I hear him mumble as he kisses down my neck and onto my collarbone.

I laugh and push him off slightly, warning, “You better go before you’re late! Chris will be here any minute!”

“Chris can wait,” I hear him say as he pulls me closer. 

“You are a bad boy… I’m married to a bad boy!” I exclaim as I jump into his arms. Now, we’re in the normal state of us before anyone goes anywhere, my legs around his waist as he props me up.

“I’m seriously going to miss you,” I whisper before I lightly kiss him on the mouth.

Then, I say, “I’m going to be so lonely in this American house without you.”

His kisses me on the lips again as he confesses, “I’m going to miss waking up next to you every morning, the sight isn’t going to be the same.”

After staring for a while, he finally grabs me in for a permanent kiss. We collide into each other as the couch comes into the picture. His fingers trickle along my back as I slowly unbutton his shirt. 

Bang! Bang! Bang! Comes from the window.

Scared of the press, I push Guy off of me, making him fall to the floor. I sit up and fix my hair, looking to see who it is. Chris stands outside of the window, laughing his ass off.

“Who is it?!” I hear Guy ask from my feet, rushing to button his shirt up.

“It’s a maniac…” I say with a sly grin, getting up to open the door.

Guy quickly gets to his feet and shouts, “Why would you open the door if it’s a maniac!”

“It’s just Chris, chill!” I say back, opening the door. But before I can greet Chris, Guy twists me around and tries to pick up where we left off. I attempt to protest, but Guy warns Chris, “You can either sit and watch, or wait in the damn car! I don’t care!” Chris continues to laugh until Guy slams the door in his face with adrenalin. We end up picking up where we left off.

After five minutes of rush hour, Guy is finally ready to go. I open the door, where Chris is already standing.

“I’m surprised you two animals don’t have noise complaints!” he states as we walk out, taking part of Guy’s bags from me, “And, Alex, I shall take care of Guy- you have no worries. If you want company, Gwyneth is in town, filming of course.”

“Oh, that’ll be great! See you two boys in a month, I suppose!” I say, trying to wave them off, for I start to feel nauseous. 

“Wait, don’t leave me hanging,” Chris says, holding up his hand. I high five it, and he sprints to the car.

“Love, I’ll miss you lots. I love you,” Guy says as he hugs me.

“I love you too… don’t forget to call,” I reply, holding on so tight, not wanting him to leave. He then kisses me before he follows Chris to the car. 

When they ride off, I run inside, straight to the bathroom. The toilet seats flies up in front of me as I hold my face over it. I clench my stomach, hoping this time nothing will happen. Yet, it does. Some of the morning’s breakfast items appear before me. Not knowing what to do, I look in the mirror at myself. 

I look different. I look weak and pale. Weight has surely been put off of me, for my clothes hang looser now. I’ve been eating like a pig though, trying to gain it back, but it comes right back up. My stomach constantly hurts too, sometimes to the point where I can’t sleep. Tears slowly squeeze out of my eyes because I can’t take it anymore. My period should be here soon, and maybe that’s why I’ve been having the symptoms. I went to the doctor, and he said everything is just fine with me. 

But it’s not. I’ve never had these symptoms before. I don’t dare to tell Guy because he needs to go on this tour- it’s huge for the band. Yet, if this keeps up, I won’t be able to go with him in a month. I’ll have to wait another month all because of a stupid sickness.

Stuck in thought, the doorbell rings. Maybe Guy forgot something…

I answer it as two voice both say, “Hi!”

My two good friends, Michelle and Amber, wait at the door before me. They come in, and I make them tea. Michelle is a psychologist, so she notices something wrong right away, “Hey, you don’t seem very happy, is anything up?”

“No… not really. Well, Guy just left for a tour, and I won’t see him for a month,” I answer, taking some of my tea in.

Amber then joins in, “Are you two having issues?” She’s only a baby nurse… she won’t know much about sickness besides in young children.

“Not at all, we actually just, you know, never mind,” I mention, starting to laugh with them both. 

Yet once it’s over, Michelle asks, “You for sure aren’t alright; you look pale. Are you sick?”

“Not that I know of,” I say, taking another sip.

“Flu has been going around early this year…” Amber says. 

I take another sip before replying, “I do not have the flu! I’m not sick!” Terrible timing for me, I get up and run to the bathroom for the third time today.

They knock on the door, asking various questions like “Are you alright?” “What color is it?” “Has this been going on lately?”

Instead of lying, I finally let them in. I remain on the floor, not feeling the need to get up. Once they examine what I’ve left, they flush it, and sit down with me. I cry as I tell them everything, also while begging them not to tell Guy. I’m worried about what’s wrong.

“Maybe it’s nerves, you seem stressed…” Michelle suggests, grabbing my hand.

“No, it can’t. I haven’t been stressed- life has been great! The press didn’t bag Guy and I about our marriage, everyone is in smiles for us! My books are selling great! We are even thinking of getting a dog!” I back up, holding my stomach.

“Didn’t you mention that Chris saw you two together? Do you think that made you worry?” Michelle questions further.

I sigh and explain, “As I said, this has been going on for weeks?”

Amber, out of blue, says, “Your period…”

“It should be here by tomorrow, or maybe it should’ve came yesterday… but periods like to goof up schedules!” I respond, feeling dizzy.

She then walks to her purse and grabs something. When she returns, she unwraps it, and tells me to pee on it. I laugh at first, but then decide to because she is considered to be trained in the medical field. 

After an hour of waiting, Amber checks on the stick I peed on. My stomach feels tight once more as she calls me into the kitchen.

“You haven’t been drinking or smoking or doing drugs this past month…?” she asks.

“No, well, wait, I had a glass of wine last week, but that’s all… why?”

“Have you participated in all night, um, intercourse?”

“No, and why do you people have the problem with the word sex?!” I exclaim, remembering the time I had that talk with Guy.

“Honey, I have to tell you something very, very important…” she begins, taking my hands into hers.

I become confused and ask, “What is it?”

My heart stops at the next two words that come out of her mouth, “You’re pregnant…”

“Wait, what?” I ask after moments of silence. This time, Michelle comes in the room to hear it herself.

Amber grabs my shoulders and says seriously, “You are pregnant, like, you have a baby inside of you!”

“Oh… my…” I begin to say before they trample me with hugs and belly pats. But then, I start to cry, of both joy and sadness.

“What’s wrong?” Michelle asks as she lets go of me.

“Before Guy and I were married, I was pregnant. I miscarried after two months,” I respond, balling now. This is going to be a long two months.


	14. O

*** Two months later***

I sit on the couch watching the Harry Potter movies when I hear the door click open. Guy then runs into the room and snatches me into his arms. He kisses me until we can’t breathe anymore.

“Lord, I have missed you so much,” he finally says as he cradles me in his arms.

“I missed you too,” I reply, holding onto him tightly.

“I can’t do that ever again,” Guy chokes out, sounding like he’s going to cry.

I look at him and say, “It’s my fault- I got sick.”

“Are you better now?”

“A lot better. I could run a marathon!”

He smirks and suggests, “We can go run one right now, upstairs, if you’re catching on…?”

I smile small and respond, “I can’t…”

“Do you want dinner first? How about Chinese?” he suggests, grabbing my hands.

I smile once more and say, “No, I just want to be here with you…” the silence lingers as he runs his fingers down my cheeks and through my hair, making sure I’m real. I then break it, saying, “I need to tell you something…”

“Babe, is something wrong?”

“Not one thing, if it’s anything, I believe it’s great,” I begin. I kneel in front of him as he remains sitting on the couch. 

I grab his hands as I say, “So, a few weeks before you even left, I was feeling sick… every day. Yet, I went to the doctor and he told me everything was alright. So the day you left, my friends came over, Michelle and Amber. They’re doctors and nurses and all that. So I got sick, and Amber made me take a test…”

“Oh, shit, do you have…?”

“No!” I laugh for a while, stalling, but then announce, “And then, the results came in.” Looking him straight in the face, I finish, “I’m pregnant.”

He looks like he’s been struck with something, in amazement though. Tears well up in his eyes again as he smiles in disbelief. I sit next to him, but he sets me on his lap, “So it’s been three months?”

“Yeah, I guess,”

He laughs as he suggests, “I think it was when we got home from the honeymoon. The night that we turned on the globe and stars and just stayed up all night.”

“Possibly…” I trail off, putting my head on his chest.

His fingers brush over my stomach as he stares at it in complete disbelief, “You aren’t messing with me, right?”

“Of course not, I wouldn’t about this sort of thing!”

He then leans over a kisses my stomach, and it feels calm, the first time in two months. I admit, “The baby likes you- my stomach just stopped hurting.”

He looks up at me now and laughs, “Well, that’s a good thing… I just can’t put words out that describe how I feel.”

“I understand. When I found out, I began to ball my eyes out. Then, I decided I’d tell you in person because it’d make more sense.”

“Thank you… not only that, but for everything…”

“What are you talking about?”

“You’re carrying something so special… something that is a symbol of our love, a real living symbol, not just certificates and photos. This is amazing, and I cannot wait to be a dad again.”

I smile and ask, “Is it hard being a parent?”

“Sometimes, but you just have to deal with it. You can’t really get rid of it. Wait, you aren’t thinking of…?”

“No! Never! This baby has a heartbeat, and I can feel it. I didn’t believe my feelings at first because I thought I was insane! I thought the ghost of the last one was haunting me…” 

He holds me tighter and whispers, “I think that baby would be thanking you, not haunting. You were going to go through with it, with or without me. It would’ve thanked you for life.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I open at the close..." HP


	15. Good Things are Coming Our Way

I go out for another month, and then, I’m on house arrest. Guy and I decide the baby won’t be a public affair, because of what happened to Chris and Gwyneth with Apple. And certainly, a baby bump will only push the press to write articles and take pictures to make up stories, even break into the house. The ones that know are our close friends and our families. 

“So, are you excited?” Gwyneth asks, helping me set up the baby room. I’m at five months now.

“Very, I dream about this every night… it’s a ticking time bomb!” I admit, painting the walls yellow.

“Are you painting these yellow for a reason, like for a song?” she asks, laughing.

I crack a smile and say, “No, it is due to the fact that Guy and I decided that we won’t want to know the gender until it physically comes out of me!”

“Oh! Well, you can still play the song!” she adds. 

**

At seven months, the phones constantly ring- the press. They often travel to all the houses too, forcing me to constantly move. Yet, Guy keeps his cool. Plus, he’s becoming fond of the bump, touching it at least once every ten minutes. At night, he places his hand over it, making it kick me.

“Honey!” I hear Guy call from living room.

“What?” I shout back, in the middle of an episode of Bones. Netflix is my life now along with my blog and laptop.

“Come here!” so, I do. In front of me, Guy stands with a dog. It’s certainly not a puppy, probably rescued. He wags his tail, and I can tell he’s a yellow lab.

“You are insane!” I say before falling into Guy’s arms. I can’t go as close as I want because the baby bump restricts that. 

He laughs and explains, “We need more security than me! So I got this big boy! Yet, you are going to name him!”

“Me?”

”Yeah, you!”

“Let’s name him after my first dog that I grew up with as a child, Bailey,” I add with a smile.

When I sit next to the new dog, he finds curiosity. Figuring I’m friendly from the petting, he licks my face, but immediately moves to my stomach. He sniffs it, making me laugh with tickling. Bailey then lays in my lap, resting on and licking my stomach. Tears fill my eyes as I watch the incarnation of my first dog become my child’s first dog.


End file.
